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Chloe Lamb: Professional Dumper

On our first night in this gorgeous Airbnb, we looked upstairs, doing a recce. It was clear that now was an appropriate time to consummate the holiday. I thought, 'surely he will now throw me on this bed'. Instead, he walked downstairs. I followed to see him opening a packet of crisps. Am I really that crap a shag that he would rather EAT CRISPS?

5 min read

It’s World Bipolar Day bitches!

She's texting her colleagues to see if anyone wants to go to the pub after work. Yes, it's a Monday, but why is everyone SO boring? She's frustrated, but re-frames it internally. She feels sorry for them that they lack her lust for life. She toys with telling them that.

7 min read

'How to Fail', with Chloe Lamb

Failure doesn't always have to be the precursor to some sort of profound success. Sometimes it's just failure. And it's funny. Pull up a pew, let's have a giggle.

5 min read

Chloe Lamb, Professional Dumpee

Pull up a pew and get ready to cringe on my behalf as I walk you through my tragic dating history...

3 min read

Chloe Lamb, Professional Nutjob

Oof, quite a big topic for so early on in this blog's (potentially short) life. Pull up a pew and grab a cuppa.

3 min read

I actually enjoyed writing this section. God, I'm such a narcissist.

Ill-informed recommendations

April '26

I've taken matters into my own hands. I've been reading NOTHING for SO LONG, I decided I needed to spend lots of ££ at Waterstones so that I had financially invested in my reading, and would feel guilt tripped into reading again. A lot of mental gymnastics for one hobby right? Welcome to my world.

Always tell myself, I have to buy a classic in Waterstones (ugh, I'm a snob) but was choosing for so long that I got trapped in the winter conundrum that is - FREEZING WEATHER + BOILING SHOPS. You simply can't stay in there for more than 7 minutes in your coat and scarf. Do you just take off your outer layers? Does that just look dramatic? Will the staff think it's a passive aggressive comment on their over - zealous heating? Either way, I was so sweaty after my 14 minute browse that I chose the above. One for fun, One for being a feminist legend, and One for being a snob.

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